short story, revised

okay, so for those of you who answered on Yahoo answers last time, this is a revised version of the short story. Still, nowhere near finished, but I tried to include people's advice on writing the story. Here's a new (and hopefully improved) version:



“Lilly!”

I groaned as I opened my eyes. I really wished it wasn’t time to get up, even if it was for my dad’s new perfect wife-to-be, or my stepmother-to-be.

“LILLY!” Dad shouted again through the open window.

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” I called back, getting out of bed.

I dragged myself over to my dresser and the open window. I could see Dad and Gladys, the fiancée, with their arms around each other and talking together in their perfect happiness outside. Oh, barf. Dad told me to be nice for Mom’s sake, though, so I knew had to try.

I took out the pearl earrings that Mom gave me before she died, or “passed away,” five years ago. The earrings reminded me of Mom a lot, since they were the only thing left that I had from her. I still got a little moody when I thought about her dying in that disgustingly bland hospital room, even if it was five years ago. Sometimes, especially when I wore the earrings she’d given me, it even seemed like I could feel her around me somewhere, protecting me from the big, bad world.

I looked at the teardrop shaped gold earrings with pearls set in them and turned them over, where there were two lilies engraved in the gold. Mom had bought the earrings a long time ago because of those lilies and how they matched my name, Lillian, or Lilly for short. They were actually pretty valuable, but it was mostly sentimental value to me. I gazed at the lilies for a moment, remembering Mom, until Dad knocked me out of my reminiscence with another deafening call. I sighed and got dressed to impress the great Gladys.

***

Ten minutes later, I stood outside with a fake smile plastered on my face with Dad, the gorgeous Gladys, and my kleptomaniac older sister Beverley, who had a thing for my stuff. And you thought it was the younger sister who always borrowed the older one’s clothes? You stand corrected.

“Beverley, Lilly, I’d like you to meet Gladys, my new fiancée. I hope you’ll treat her like a second mother,” Dad said.

“Oh, you two are so beautiful. Just like your names,” gushed Gladys, who was just bursting with joy at her newfound motherhood.

Bev warmed right up to Gladys’ good nature and compliments. I decided she was okay and nice enough as she cracked a couple of lame jokes, even if she could never replace Mom. But then, who could? I knew I would have to put up with her anyway, since she was moving in that day. Dad was never really one to listen to our opinions of the endless ways he’d tried to change our lives, but this was kind of jumping the gun, don’t you think?

***

I woke up the next day thinking it would be a long first day living with Gladys. Of course I could already hear Bev skipping downstairs in her usual, unbearably cheerful way. She was extremely happy to have a new future mom, unlike me. I knew she missed Mom, too, though. Why else would she always take my earrings all the time when she had an entire drawer full of them (okay, so they were a bit cheaper than the ones Mom had given me, but that’s not the point)?

Dad was probably wondering why I was still in bed by now, so I knew I had to get dressed and everything. I yawned a bit during the long journey of three feet from my bed to the dresser and opened my jewelry box to find…that my earrings were gone. Beverley was so dead.

“Bev!” I screamed, now fully awake, thundering downstairs to where the rest of my family and Gladys were eating breakfast.

“What?” Bev scowled, since I had interrupted her conversation with Gladys. Some sister, picking Gladys over me.

“My earrings! You know, the ones Mom gave me. The ones you STOLE?” I yelped at her.

“Oh, right,” said Bev, smiling innocently. “I forgot to ask and of course, I didn’t want to wake you. I’m borrowing them, ‘kay?”

I was about to yell at her some more, but then Dad started getting mad too, shouting that here I was, still in my pajamas, bringing down the house with my tantrums, and jeez, why were teenagers so annoying at fourteen, blah blah blah. He was probably thinking that I was making a bad impression on Gladys.

“Tom, calm down. I’m sure Lilly was just worried that her valuable earrings were missing. Lilly, why don’t you eat with us while you’re down here? I made waffles,” said Gladys, suddenly becoming the Avery family’s peacemaker.

I flashed Gladys a smile for defending me and stuck my tongue out at Bev behind Dad’s back for taking my earrings. I decided that I liked Gladys much better today, and her homemade waffles were delicious.

***

Two weeks later, Gladys was nicely settled in with us as our official stepmother, since the wedding had gone without a hitch the week before. I was starting to accept her for helping me when Dad went into his lecturing mode or when Bev went into her “borrowing” mode. Maybe it was nice to have a stepmother like Gladys around after all.

Rise and shine, Lilly, it’s time to get up. Seriously, why did the dresser seem so far away from the bed every morning?

Oh, my God. My earrings were gone again. Jeez, Bev, you’d think that once every two weeks would be enough for you.

“Bev, did you take my earrings again?” I yelled, sprinting out the door and down the hallway to her room.

“What are you talking about? I didn’t take Mom’s earrings,” she said without even bothering to take out her headphones. Uh-huh, yeah, suuure.

“Then would you happen to know why they’re missing? Again?” I said in my best fake-polite voice.

“How should I know?” Bev said in her bitchy, I’m-seventeen-and-way-too-cool-to-help-my-obnoxious-little-sister way.

“What’s going on?” said Gladys, who was passing by Bev’s room.

“Bev stole my earrings again,” I said.

“Lilly’s being a brat again,” said Bev mimicked me.

“Hey, I do not sound like that.” I gave Bev my very best death stare, reserved for any potential assaulters and annoying older sisters.

“Oh, well, if Beverley says she didn’t take the earrings, I’m sure she didn’t. They’re probably just on the floor somewhere, Lilly,” Gladys comforted. “I have to go buy some groceries at the supermarket right now, but I really hope you find them, Lilly,” Gladys continued, hurrying out.

I gave up because I knew Bev had won. I was going to look everywhere until I found them, though, especially in Bev’s room.

***

Half an hour later, I still hadn’t found my earrings and was getting frustrated. The only room left was Dad and Gladys’ bedroom. I’d checked everywhere else in the house, double-checking Bev’s room to be sure. I doubted that the earrings would be in Dad and Gladys’ room since I barely ever went in there and I was starting to lose hope of ever finding my earrings again.

I was pretty sure it wasn’t Bev by now. She was a little nicer when she saw that I was really worried about my earrings, but she still said she hadn’t taken them. Sure, Bev got on my nerves with the constant “borrowing,” but she was usually pretty good about being honest and giving them back to me (eventually). Gladys was probably right about my earrings.

I looked under Dad and Gladys’ bed, hoping against hope that maybe I’d accidentally dropped the earrings near it. Nothing but dust bunnies. Sigh. I sat on the bed looking into Mom’s old mirror.

“Sorry about the earrings, Mom,” I whispered at my reflection.

Suddenly, I saw Mom standing next to Gladys’ dresser’s reflection in the mirror! I nearly fell off the bed from surprise. I slowly walked closer to the mirror and glanced around the room, but there was no one there except for me. Was I going crazy? Sure, I’d thought that I could feel her presence before, but I’d chalked that up to depression and wanting to have Mom back again. I looked back at the mirror and she was still there.

“Mom?” I whispered, not sure if it was really Mom or just a sign that I needed to be sent to an asylum. I mean, seriously, not to be mean or anything, but wasn’t she supposed to be dead?

Mom didn’t answer. Instead, she lifted up her hand and pointed towards Gladys’ dresser in an ominous, ghost-y kind of way. I blinked in confusion, and when my eyes were open again, she’d disappeared.

“Mom?” I asked the reflection again, this time out loud. I winced when I noticed that my voice cracked a little.

Had she really been here? It might’ve just been me hallucinating right? Maybe she really had been here, but why?

Suddenly, I thought of it. Maybe she had come to help me find my earrings. She had pointed towards Gladys’ dresser in the few seconds that she’d stayed. She was probably hinting that I’d lost them around there. Or maybe I was just imagining that Mom had even been in the mirror.

I looked around the dresser and on top of it, where Gladys’ black jewelry box rested, but there was no trace of the earrings. What did Mom mean? I was about to give up on Mom’s hint when my gaze fell on Gladys’ jewelry box again.

Was that what Mom meant? Gladys seemed so nice, though. If I found my earrings in the jewelry box, it would mean that Gladys had taken my earrings. I didn’t want that, but I believed in Mom before anything else, including Gladys.

With trembling fingers, I opened the jewelry box. Underneath the shining necklaces and bracelets, there was an envelope, almost hidden under all the glamor of the jewelry. I didn’t see my earrings anywhere else, so I picked up the envelope. It was labeled “Pawn Shop” on one side in neat black marker. If my earrings were in that envelope, I knew I could never believe in just a sweet personality ever again.

My fingers fumbled on the envelope flap and I accidentally tore it a bit before looking inside.

Two pearls reflected in my eyes.